Monthly Archives: October 2012

Back to work after a break?

Any woman who has a career and a family automatically develops something in the way of two Back to  work after a breakpersonalities, like two sides of a dollar bill, each different in design.

Her problem is to keep one from draining the life from the other.- Ivy Baker PriestIt’s common for women to take break from work due to pregnancy, child care, to take care of their family, to manage any contingencies at home, in case of prolonged illness or just to take a breather of freedom from work.

Whatever the reason, when women decide to get back to work, it gets difficult. Well, it doesn’t have to be.Certain general tips shall help you in making your come back to work easier and better:

TIPS

  1. Keep in touch : While you are away from your career world, never loose in touch with your ex-colleagues and friends. Keep them on your radar and contact them casually from time to time. Such a network will help when you decide to get back to work later on.
  2.  Be aware of the career world: Just because you are not working, it does not mean that you should not be aware of the latest developments in corporate, the job market and the HR world etc. Read articles on current affairs and current market conditions and improve on your knowledge. Browse on the jobs in the job sites and understand the demand for the kind of the job you were doing before you took the break.
  3.  Enrich your knowledge: Enrol in a foreign language course; enrol in satellite, correspondence or week end courses in your selected branch of studies. Get an additional diploma or a certificate relating to your line of work. Your resume will speak of your dedication to your working knowledge, even during the break period. It will give a positive impression on the interviewer when you attend your interviews.
  4.  Enrol in an employable skills course: There are more courses in the world than the stars blanketing on the Returning To Work After a Long Breakvelvet skies. Just enrol yourself in one of the courses, where they may sharpen your skills in interviews, self confidence etc. This may help you tremendously, if need be.
  5.  Technology: While on learning, make sure that you are computer savvy and improve your skill sets according to the technology demands of your career path.
  6.  Update your resume: Update your resume; do not bother about the gaps in your bio-data. If you show self confidence and convey a proper justification for your absence from the career world, the recruiter will understand.
  7.  Park your resume in job sites: When you decide to get back to work, upload your resume to the job sites; check your latest email id and phone numbers in the resume, so that the prospective companies and consultants can contact you without strain.
  8.  Contact: Contact the corporate, management and HR consultancies; make enquiries. Send across your resume to them all. If you have decided to do something, do it aggressively.
  9.  Take Help: Take the help of all and sundry; take the help from your ex-colleagues and friends; take the help from your ex-boss,  supervisor, manager and the head of the department for job opportunities and references etc.
  10.  Social networking sites: Become a part of a trust worthy and reputed job related social networking sites, wherein it will be easy to get referred by some one for a job or to get to know of an opening somewhere etc. Remember, the word “trust” is the golden rule, especially when you are going to give out all your personal information on the net.
  11.  Negotiate with your employer: Take a decision whether you would like to come back as a part time, full time or as a freelancer employee and accordingly, negotiate the terms with your employer.
  12.  Prepare yourself: Groom yourself. Set-up your wardrobe in line with your work. Take care of your fitness.

FAQS

 Q I took time off from work for a couple of years due to pregnancy and child birth etc.tips for mom Even though I now would like to get back to the career world, I am unsure of myself and hesitant to appear for interviews. I feel sort of uneasy and terrified of going back to work. What to do?

It seems that you had cut yourself off totally from the career world during your break. That should not be.  However, you may enrol yourself in a soft skills course relevant to your requirement, wherein they may train you in the path to the self confidence, including that of facing the interview board and other necessary skills.

Develop self-confidence; straighten your posture and look interviewer at eye level and smile. Be truthful in your responses.

I am sure you will come out in flying colours and shall land yourself an excellent opportunity in no time.

Perseverance is failing nineteen times and succeeding the twentieth. -Julie Andrews

Gospel Truth!

Q I have taken a break for 2 years and want to return to work. People who were reporting to me have become bosses now. It will be very difficult for me to work under them. How should I handle this issue?

One of your options, could be starting off with another company, instead of re-joining your former job. However, if you do choose to join the same company again, remember, that it is only a matter of re-proving yourself and capabilities, before you catch up, in the race. When you return back to work after a hiatus, there will be some confidence, and ego issues. Don’t let them get in the way of your progress. You will soon bounce back!

Remember beautiful words of Eleanor Roosevelt:

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”

 

 Smita’s Advice

 

As men take on the role of the prime bread winners, it is the women who take a break from work, short or long, a few months or a few years; never think that you are losing on anything since you took a break. Stay positive and be confident.

The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.

~ Sonya Friedman

 

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Homemade Cures

 Fix for Stings and Sores

Natural medicines are the best cures for ailments. They have no side effects, they are not artificially createdNatural medicines with chemicals and the best part is that you can concoct them at home for nothing. Yes, you guessed right, we are talking about homemade remedies that can be used to cure basic infirmities and work out to be an inexpensive way of looking after your precious health.

Long before the world developed the modern medicine, people depended on their age-old traditions and made home-based cures to revive their strength and keep fit. It will not be incorrect to say that even today some people believe in using remedies that have been handed down to them by their forefathers.

You too can use these timeless remedies to cure basic conditions at home and benefit from the wealth of knowledge that our ancestors left behind for us.

Here are some basic homemade cures that you use next time you feel down and under.

 TIPS

1. Cold and Cough: If you are suffering from cold and cough, you should have a cup of warm water mixed with honey and lemon to soothe your aching throat. You can also add bite size pieces of ginger to the drink. Ginger is known for its medicinal qualities and provides great relief to a sore throat.

2. Joint Pains: If you regularly suffer from muscle and joint pains, you could use stingingmedication bottle nettles to cure aches. This is commonly used as a herbal medicine but should not be applied on skin directly. Its leaves have to be used when dried and should be consumed in the form of tea. You can also use it as a topical soak for aching joints.

3Scars, Burns and Wounds: Turmeric powder is a substance that has amazing medicinal qualities. This spice is not just used for cooking but also to cure long standing conditions. It can be applied on open wounds and can stop the skin from scarring. Turmeric powder is also said to have anti-cancer properties that is helpful in curing people with tumors and melanoma. Aloe Vera is known for its medicinal uses especially over burns.

4. Diarrhea: The best homemade recipe for treating a person with diarrhea is to headacemix ripe banana with nutmeg powder and eat daily. Another popular remedy is to make a date paste with honey and consume the mixture 4-5 times in a day. Black tea with some lime juice also does wonders.

5. Headache: Many people suffer from headaches on a regular basis, to overcome this you can try eating an apple with salt on empty stomach everyday.

6. High Blood Pressure: If you suffer from high BP, try the solution of honey, ginger and cumin seeds. Mix these ingredients well and drink twice a day for controlling your blood pressure.

 

FAQS 

Q. What homemade cures can I use for stomachaches?homemade remedies

Take a hot drink of lemon tea with honey in it.

Q. Is there homemade remedy for toothaches?

A simple cure is to keep a clove between the teeth or apply clove oil.

Q. What can I do to control nausea and vomiting?

Mix lime juice with honey and ginger and drink the mixture. It should help you feel better.honey

Q. What is common cure for fevers?

The best thing is to eat things rich in Vitamin-C. This helps fight off infections. Having grape juice and oranges will build your immune system.

 

 

Smita’s Advice

The human body is vulnerable to diseases but nature has also blessed us with antidotes to cure ourselves. Natural and homemade treatments work wonders on your health. You will never feel the need to take antibiotics for conditions that can easily be cured at home.

Take care of yourself and remember that: best solutions in life are always the simple ones.

 

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Team Management

Team ManagementWomen are meant for multi-tasking; they are versatile and are creative in nature. They are more communicative than men, understanding and adjusting to the people and the circumstances.

They are effective in bringing a consensus on a given topic and are good in taking work from people.

If you want to manage your team effectively, you may make a note of the following common tips:

 

 TIPS

1. Get to Know Your Team: In the, “Undercover Boss, America”, I had time and again noticed that the CEO (who is the Undercover Boss of the company) strives hard to get to know his staff fairly well. He asks a lot of questions about the personal life of his people; he understands their stress, anxieties, financial strains and family details. By the end of it all, he helps the deserving staff in one wonderful way or the other.

Get to know your team well. A birthday present, a morning greeting by name, a film ticket for his family once in a while, a dinner arrangement with his family occasionally, a bouquet on their anniversary etc. shall endear you to your team. Your team will understand that you really care for their well-being.

2. Walk with your Team: A leader walks with her team, whereas a boss walks before her team. Be with your team and be available for them. Be a team player yourself, so that your team will follow suit.

3. Be a Role Model: Be punctual at work, so that your team will understand the value of time. Be a role modelBe open to suggestions, so that your team will understand the value of dialogues. Be kind to the people, so that your team will share your kindness with the others. Be a role model to your team!

Have a role model for yourself. There are so many woman leaders who have reached their zenith in public life, business, politics, communications etc. Be impressed by a role model to draw a constant inspiration from her.

4. Appreciate your team: People would love to get appreciated: wouldn’t you?

Even if there is a small improvement at work because of some one, appreciate them. Appreciate the appearance, the timely help by someone, the late sitting of your team member to complete a project, the combined effort of an enthusiastic group of people despite long hours; the sharing of the files and folders, the repair of the Xerox machine, the passing of a cup of coffee and the efforts of your team despite failures; just appreciate them.

A sincere appreciation can get your work done much faster than the monetary compensation you might offer to your team.

5. Criticize your team member when alone: Appreciation should be done in front of the others,Party with the team whereas even a constructive criticism should be made when you are alone with the team member. Show respect to someone’s self-respect and dignity. Do not hurt or humiliate people ever!

6. Be knowledgeable: Be well-prepared and be knowledgeable not only about your part of the work, but also about your team’s responsibilities. It will help you in understanding the efforts put in by them and accepting their faults as and when it happens. If you know the reality, you wouldn’t expect miracles without proper preparation and help to your team.

7. Train your Team: Training your team from time to time according to their requirement on the job and on the soft skills shall help you tremendously in getting the work done effortlessly from them. Providing training to your people is an investment on their potential.

8. Keep the Communication Channel Open: Always initiate dialogue and discussion on the topics of your day to day affairs. Listen to your team and listen carefully to their words. Make them to understand that you care for them. Help wherever you possibly can. Encourage their positivity by being a true leader.

FAQS

I am a manager in a big corporate and I have a lot of people reporting to me, directly or indirectly; the issue is that I am unable to make them to get excited about their jobs. They work with a bored resignation on their jobs and it hurts me. I just want them to feel passionate about their work and I want them to enjoy working with me. What can I do?

Have you read the book, “Fish?” Every one should read it. It is an amazing book of a mere 112 pages with a power packed and joyful description of the Seattle’s Pike Place Fish Market.

It is the Alchemist of the Work place Story on how to boost the morale and on how to improve on the productivity of the office staff.

It is not necessarily your fault that your people are not happy with their job. However, you could always help them to start enjoying their work.

You could read the book and devise your own ways and means of bringing in the positive changes in your office atmosphere.

Smita’s Advice

Women are naturally positive and can motivate people to do work and work effectively towards any set target. They are born Managers and can efficiently do Multitasking.

“A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.”

John C. Maxwell quotes

So, be a leader, know the way, go the way and show the way to your team!

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Doing Make-Up

Doing Make-Up risk free make up tips

Your make up depends upon your skin type: you may not wear a make up meant for dry skin to the oily skin. Hence identify your skin type, whether it is neutral, dry, oily or moisturized skin. You must obviously know your skin type; if not, you may take the help of the cosmetic shop people. They will take the basic test and shall let you know of your skin type.

You may also ask their advice for the make up items that are suitable for your skin type and shop for them according to your budgetary requirements.

 TIPS

  1. Use Quality Products: You may always buy a couple of quality products at a higher  tips on the make up artprice rather than buying ten low quality products at a cheaper cost. Remember, the make up materials are full of chemicals and if you would compromise on their quality, they may compromise on your skin.
  1. Make up your Neck: Whenever you apply make up, always stretch it to your neck too. Otherwise, your face will look decorated and your neck will look shades darker.
  1. Make up and skin tone: Whatever the colour you choose for your make up, make sure that it matches your skin tone, your eyes and your hair colour.
  1. Make up for the occasion: Your make up should always match the occasion: there should be differences between your make up for career interview, marriages, family function, for travelling etc.
  1. Remove your make up: Always remove all your make-up before going to bed in order to avoid prolonged chemical exposure to your face, eyes, lips and skin.

Easy Application of Make-Up Tips: 

A few general tips on the make up art may help you on this:

  1. Base Wash: Your face needs to be smooth and clean, before you start applying your  tips on the make up art
    make up. Hence wash up well; you may also undergo facials in the parlour or go for a quickie clean up routine at home. Anti bacterial soap should be used if you have acne on your face. Apply toner to remove the residue dirt and to restore the pH balance in balance.
  1. Moisturizer: Apply moisturizer on the skin irrespective of the skin type and wait for a few minutes for the skin to absorb it.
  1. Primer: Apply Base coatr on your face: it would help your make up to last longer and help in reducing the pores on your face.
  1. Concealer and Foundation: Apply concealer on the spots and blemishes on your face and then apply the foundation. Foundation, like every other make up material, is available in different shades and hues and you should choose the foundation that is suitable for your skin.
  1. Highlighter: Apply highlighter on your cheek bones and brow bones etc. It will help in highlighting the contours and profile of your face.
  1. Smile and Blush: Apply blush to the apples of your cheeks and below your cheek bones. Smile before you do so, to lock the blush on to the exact position. Blend it back towards the hairline.
  1. Eyes:
    How to Apply Eye Makeup
  • Eyeliner: You may use light brown or black eye liner to line your eyes. Use lighter eye shade on the eye lids and crease. With a darker colour complementary to the lighter eye shade, start at the outer corner of the eye and draw the shadow along the crease and the edge of the eye lid. Use a light shade on the outer side of the bottom lid.
  • Eyebrow Pencil: If you have gaps in your eye brow, use eyebrow pencil to fill in the missed area(s).
  • Mascara: By using a clean mascara brush, coat the eye lashes in such a way that they stand out in their individual lengths.

8.     Lips: Use a lips pencil to outline your lips and
Use a lips pencil create the shape. Apply a coat of lipstick,
followed by a matching gloss to square off your lip looks.

9.     Time and make up: For daytime make up, use lighter shades and neutral colours; use just a coat or two of the make up materials to keep the effect lighter. In the evenings or at night, use brighter shades, glitters, more coats and indulge in a variety of colours.

 

FAQS

Q I am undergoing certain eye related issues and am under treatment for it. I use light make up most of the time. Can I touch up a light bit on my eyes too? My eyes look sunken while the rest of my face is nicely made up.

As you are undergoing eye treatment, you should refer this question to your ophthalmologist. He is the right person to respond, as he knows the current status of your eye issue. One thing for sure is don’t use cheap quality products.

Q When going for parties I usually apply foundation. Do I need to wear powder over my foundation as well?

Yes, you should apply foundation especially if you have oily or combination skin. Because, Powder helps foundation  to stay for long and controls the oils to give it a better look. It is  also helpful for smooth application of other powder-based products, such as blush and eye shadow.

Smita’s Advice

Well, make up does give a boosted confidence to a woman. It should however be well worn, and not to be left with blotches and blemishes around the face.

Make up depends upon the mind-set of a woman. Some women look amazing without make up too. To do make up or not to do, depends upon your time element, convenience, compatibility of the make up materials with your skin type and the pride you take in maintaining of your appearance.

 

“I love the confidence that makeup gives me.”
– Tyra Banks

 

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Learning Foreign Language

 

Wiki says that Mandarin language (Chinese family) is spoken by 1025 million people, French by 120 million Learning Foreign Languagepeople, Hindustani (Hindi and Urdu) by 490 Million people and English by about 1.5 billion people!

Learn a couple of new languages and you will be introduced to millions of new people, their literature, their culture, their way of thinking, their way of living, their music and the works!

While traveling abroad, when you speak the language of a country to its natives, you respect their people and you get their love and admiration in volumes in return. Just look at the surprise and the smile on the face of the native person even when you smatter out a question in their language, let me tell you, it’s worth all your efforts in learning a new language.

There are certain general tips that may help you in learning a new language:

 

TIPS

1. Choose the language: The choice of the language depends upon your reason for learning it. Whether it is for your immigration purposes, whether you are going to study abroad, or may be, like me you are impressed with a country and would like to know more about them. The reasoning follows the choice of your languages to learn!

2. Courses and materials: The physical and the virtual world is full of courses for learning various languages;Ancient coins you may choose the course in full time, part time, week end, e-course, satellite course etc. depending upon your time availability, your time zone and the duration of the course etc.

3.Tools and Materials: Different tools may be made use of, apart from your course materials, for your learning purposes; like dictionary, thesaurus, e-books, DVD, grammar and phrase books, e-translators etc. You may even take the help of easy readers like Amazon kindle, Sony Reader, Cybook Opus and the jetbook to download any books that you may need for study or reference.

4. The Time Factor: Guess human race must be the only species in the Universe, which is perpetually complaining of their lack of time before taking up any new task! We always crib for short of time, despite having 86,400 seconds in a day! Time can be easily made use of, if you take advantage of all your slippery seconds, minutes and the hours!

5. How to learn in anyway? : Learning a brand new language is a different body of game altogether, compared to learning a language from the same family. Ex: If you know Sanskrit, it would be easy for you to learn Hindi, Tamil, Kannada etc. as they all belong to the family of Sanskrit.

If you are learning a brand new language like Spanish, French, Chinese or Russian etc. you need to listen to the phonetics, focus on the words and phrases; understand the characters and practice; accumulate your vocabulary; there is a wealth of sources available on the net. Listen and read; read and listen. Meet new words and note down their meaning and use in phrases. It of course, needs the investment of your time, the time that would be well spent!

6. Learning and You: A teacher can teach you only to a certain extent: whether it is at the basic levels, Learning Yourselfsmiddle or advanced levels, the trainer can only train you to a certain extent. Unless you put you heart and brain into the learning, a language can not be caught hold of. You should take the responsibility of your learning and should show an enormous interest in them.

7. Make friends with the native speakers: If you are learning German, and if possible, try to make friends with some one who speaks German and practice your language on them. It will help you in correcting your pronunciation, learning to make use of the same words with different meanings and for accumulation of new words etc.

8. Watch Movies: The easiest way to learn a new language is to watch plenty of movies in that language while undergoing the course. With the body language of the characters readily expresses the meaning of the dialogue in the movies, it will be easy for you to co-ordinate the details in the mind. That’s how I had learned my new languages.

FAQS

Q. I have started learning a new language: it’s very tough to learn, pronounce the words, and commit to memory. Sometimes, I feel that I should stop this pain right away. I am overwhelmed!

  • This is how the beginning happens and as you have not stopped learning so far shows your commitment to learning. That’s a good sign!
  • Just like you have segregated time for eating, sleeping etc. segregate half an hour for studies, apart from your classes, for your new language. Don’t skip.
  • The more you will start learning, the more interest you shall develop, and the more time you would start allotting automatically for more studies.
  • Use entertainment channels constructively: listen to music in your new language, watch TV serials in your new language and watch movies in your new language; never mind, you won’t understand much in the beginning. You will start understanding the language in the due course of time. Be patient and givebenefits of learning a foreign language yourself some time. The moment you start understanding the language in bits and pieces, you will start loving the learning in anyway!

Q. What are the benefits of learning a foreign language?

When you know foreign language communication becomes easier while traveling to that region. You can easily and immediately connect with the local people. It’s helpful on work front, for students who have gone to study there, appreciating their culture and literature, making new friends, global understanding etc.

 

Smita’s Advice

Learning a new language opens doors to an entire civilization! Don’t take learning as a burden. Enjoy learning other languages.

“Those who know many languages live as many lives as the languages they know.”
– Czech proverb

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Menu Planning

“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, tips to help you in menu planningcooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly.”

Robert Heinlein

Wonderfully said! To slightly modify, a human being should not only cook a tasty meal, but also do the meal planning well in advance!

You know exactly what you are going to cook on any given day and that itself is the biggest advantage of menu planning. You may refer to the cook books or take the help of the Google search and collect menus, segregating and allotting them to different dates in advance.

Some general tips to help you in menu planning for a successful cooking management:

 

TIPSChoices of family members

1. Choices of family members: When you decide on the menu, you should take into account the age group of the people at your home, diet or disease constraints in their food consumption, the probability of religious fasting in the family, frequency of meal intakes and the likelihood of the arrival of any guests during the period. All these factors directly affect your menu planning.

2. Duration: Decide on the period of menu planning; whether it is for a week or for a couple of weeks or more.

3. Do Research: Google for various recipes and select those suitable for your purpose out of the innumerable choices available on the net.

4. Make the List: Once you have planned your menu, keep the list readily available for ready reference.Make a list You may keep it in the kitchen shelf, pin it on the fridge door or on the notice board, and keep it anywhere that is easily accessible for your ready reference.

5. Variety and Variations: Variety is the spice of not only your life but also of your meals. Bring in a variety in your meals to satisfy both the appetite and the nourishment requirement of your family. Even the left over food should be used in a unique way.

6. Shop in Bulk: Whatever the missing ingredients are at home should be compensated by shopping in bulk for the entire period of menu planning. It shall also save your costs and help in your budgeting.

7. Nutritious Food: You should include various colours of fruits and vegetables, milk and milk products, Nutritious Foodwhole grains, pulses and cereals and other food ingredients that would help in maintaining the energy levels of your family; that would help in the growth and the body building requirements of your family; all the more, it should help in maintaining the good health and well being of your family.

8. Seasons: While selecting the recipe, always remember the season of the year and the availability factor of the fruits and vegetables. Certain fruits and vegetables shall be available in abundance in certain seasons and shall not be available in other seasons. This is an important factor to be remembered while selecting your recipes at the time of menu planning.

9. Garnish: The beauty of a meal is half its looks; if the meal looks colourful, nicely garnished and smells good; that would invites people to eat. Plan accordingly. You should also plan to substitute butter and fattening oils with healthy olive oil for cooking. Try to reduce the intake of salt and sugar, the twin inevitable ingredients of most meals, but nevertheless unhealthy for a variety of reasons for most people. Try also to avoid soft drinks.

10. Healthy Food: Instead of mindless oil soaked snacks, introduce olives and almonds for snacks. Replace the fried foods with baked and boiled foods. Replace white bread with brown breads. All berries are good for health, the blueberries, raspberries, strawberries, blackberries and cranberries. Make them a part of your menu planning.

FAQS

I take all the efforts to plan menu at least for two weeks in advance. I abide by the plan for aChoosing the right food to be cooked couple of days and then start cooking on impulse, on a temptation to eat something on the spot and the compulsive requests from the children to prepare something unaccounted for in my planner. How to strictly adhere to my planned menu?

Don’t we all do that occasionally? You spend time and efforts to prepare the schedule, you do shopping to be ready with the ingredients, and you do stick to it for a couple of days. Then, bang it goes with the wind.

Well, include your temptation foods in your menu while planning. Include the favourite foods of your children on a daily basis. Planning nutritional meals does not mean ignoring the wants of your children. Give them the healthy foods in degrees and not all at one time. The more you gradually introduce healthy and TASTY foods and withdraw junk and unhealthy foods, the children will adjust to them gradually as well. You may find a change in their attitude and a change in your attitude towards food too.

Q I am a working mom. Although I plan menu on weekly basis, but find less time for cooking. How can I plan it more efficiently?

Its simple. Keep few important pastes and sauces ready in your refrigerator. It saves lot of your time while cooking.Keep chopped veggies for emergencies. Its good to try new dishes once in a while. But on regular bases stick to your basic food. Over weekends you can do preparations in kitchen for the coming week.

 

Smita’s Advice

Whether it is cooking at home, or planning for a party, you need to plan your menu well in advance. Advanced meal planning shall save your time on a day to day basis;You may save on your budget by pre planning and shopping at one go.

You just need to spend some time in planning, which would be well worth your efforts.

 

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Fights and Arguments

Fighting in the family:

Fighting add spice to the married life; no one can live on smiles, love and hugs all through their lives.Fight in the family When you are an individual and holds an independent view on things, is capable of making your own decisions and you are living with an individual who has got his own way of approach to life; well, it’s natural that clash arises when one refuse to see the other’s point of view on things and situations.

Rather fighting is the most natural thing that happens in any household: whether it is with your parents, life partner, children and other family members, fighting do happen.

There are two ways of handling the situation. Either, you fight to win or you fight to find a common solution to the issue in hand.

By fighting to win, you really are fighting to loose. By hurting your partner or your family members time and again, you may win the fight, but you will loose the battle!

Fighting with the others:

Unlike in marriage and with the other members of the family, the fight with the outside world needs less caution and more spirit in fighting. Or is it so?

Fighting with any one, whether it is with someone from within the family or with someone from outside the family, invariably leaves a bitter taste on the minds of the involved parties.
Fighting should have a component of dignity in it; it should not become a time-pass factor to the others like watching a street play or an opera!

Certain tips are given below with the main purpose of managing the fighting in your  life:

 TIPS

1. Fighting is momentary: Always remember that the fighting is momentary .There is always an underlying reason for the fight to happen, which generally doesn’t surface into the argument due to one reason or the other; describe your emotions clearly, instead of fighting back and forth without getting into the real cause of the fight.

2. Don’t drag the past into the present: Do not drag the past fighting details into the present fight.Stress Keep your focus on finding the solution ‘only’ for the present situation.

3. Don’t play the blame game: Don’t use the blanket blame phrases like, ‘you are insensitive, irresponsible, impossible; ‘you are always like this’, ‘you don’t help me at all’ and ‘you don’t stand by me’ etc.

If you are emotionally hurt, talk about your emotions and not about the other person’s personality or attributes.

4. Forward and Accept Suggestions: Suggest to your partner a solution for the cause of the fight and listen carefully to his suggestion on the solution from his side.

Try to find a mid-way that would suit both of you to end the fight smoothly. It should never be either your way or highway sort of the thing!

5. Show respect to your partner: Do not start listing out the weaknesses of your partner while fighting. That would intensify the fighting and would increase the mutual hurt. Apologize instantly if you are in the wrong and mend the relationship immediately.

6. Listen to his inner cry: Sometimes, fighting starts not because of the present situation, but because it triggers up some unwanted hurt or anger from the past. Listen to the inner cry of your partner and find a solution to his past hurts.

7. Appropriate timing: Fight should never be started at the time when your partner is getting ready for the office, working on some projects, is about to retire for the night; while the guests are staying at your home or in front of your children. You should be sensitive to the timing of the fight.

8. Certain important don’t while fighting: Don’t yell at your partnerFights and argument

Don’t use words like always, never, hopeless, fit for nothing, can’t expect anything from you etc.

Don’t indulge in character assassination

Don’t assume you are on the right without knowing the full facts

Don’t use below the belt tactics

Don’t compare the person with the others and insult him

Don’t assume an aggressive body posture

Don’t mention the word, “Divorce” while fighting with your life partner.

Don’t sulk or stop talking once the fight is over

9. Conquer and Last Word: Fighting is not a country to be conquered and it is not necessary that you should have the last word in the fight before storming out of the room or slamming down the receiver.

Show maturity and walk away with a purpose of bringing in some water to your partner or putting away the phone simply because you want to give some cool off space between both of you.

FAQS

Q. I and my husband fights over everything; right from the remote control of the TVfamily fights till the upbringing of our children. We can never converse after the first five minutes. We only fight and I feel bad and would like to end our way of fighting on every little thing. How to go about this?

  • There seems to be an underlining conflict in your fights. It could be an emotional hurt, anger or any other unresolved issue from your pasts that comes out so negatively in your daily life and in your mutual dealings.
  •  You need to dig deep into your consciousness and should find out the real reason for the constant imbalance in your relationship. Try to adjust wherever possible. Give him space and listen to his inner cries.
  •  It’s better to take the help of a trained professional to resolve your mutual emotional issues.


Smita’s Advice

Don’t fight with vengeance; don’t fight to win. You should fight only to find an amicable solution for the problem at hand, because fighting is momentary and the relationships are forever!

Learn to argue effectively and listen actively.

Always remember:

“An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.”

-      Mahatma Gandhi

 Smita Recommend

Watching 

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Reading

Making Up After Fighting

Argument Techniques To Avoid

E   Book - Constructive Arguing: How to Fight Fair in Relationships

Book – Save Your Relationship By Learning To Fight Fair

Book - Domestic Battles – Here Is How To Bring Back Peace To Your Couple

Book – Stop Fights! – Key Tactics To Deal With Relationship Conflicts


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Importance of Computer Knowledge

Why it is essential for today’s women to be literate in computers?

Who else can describe a computer better than Bill Gates?Importance of computer knowledge

“I think it’s fair to say that personal computers have become the most empowering tool we’ve ever created. They’re tools of communication, they’re tools of creativity, and they can be shaped by their user.”

- Bill Gates

Computers can be used in so many million ways today; it’s rather made for today’s woman!

Computer knowledge not only gives a fresh boost to your regular career, but also is useful in many other ways for you. It is needless to mention that knowledge of computers is a must not only for working women but also for homemaker.

A few common tips on the other ways and means by which you may make use of the computers in your daily life:

 TIPS

1. Work from HomeIf you are a young mom, if you are taking care of a senior, if you are work from homesuffering from ill-health; whatever the reason may be, if you want to earn money working from home, you can do so today with the help of the computer and the internet.

You may run a small business from home and can draft a business plan, maintain the database of the contacts, send the intro letters to clients, keep track of your business, bill your clients and maintain the other business details in your system.

You may become a writer, a copywriter and can even write your books or blogs from home.

You may share your expertise on various things on the net, can become a Virtual Assistant, Data base Manager, an E-Store Owner, an abstract painter and more.

2. Connect with the WorldA computer and an internet can connect you to more people in the world than ever before. You can easily get connected with your old school friends whom you have lost touch with otherwise. through the social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter, Stumble Upon, Google+, Orkut, CafeMom, myLife and others.

Social networking has become kind of a mass addiction and does not require much of computer knowledge for being handled.

You may post your thoughts, participate in the comments, and make friends with some one from the other corner of the world.

By browsing through the various posts and pictures, you may smile a bit, you may laugh a bit and you may feel happy despite of your immediate problems and circumstances.

3. Search for Multitudes of Things: I am a Google person; for the biggest of big things and for the smallest of small things I Google around and Google about regularly.

You may Google around for anything; buy a surprise gift for your husband, order your fashion accessories from an E-shopping network, learn how to make your child’s paper plane, take tips to keep your closet clean, for flower arrangement, keep in touch with your financial status through your banking website, pay your bills, recharge your prepaid mobile phone, well, you choose your requirements, go ahead and find it all on the Mother net!

4. Videos and Chats :There is no reason to be upset with your son or daughter staying away. videos and chatsYou can keep in touch with them on a routine basis; see them or speak to them through Skype and Gtalk, contact them through email or by the other means of chat programs; get in touch with them through social networking sites and more. Installing these can be done quickly and without any hassle.

5. Learn something new: You may learn a new language, get tips from the ‘how to’ websites on various and sundry things, enrol into a program of spiritual and mental well-being, practice meditation with the soft music from the music sites, get into the ‘all possible’ mode through the inspirational sites. You can achieve more things working through computers today than had ever before!

6. Use of computer in other ways: You can make Excel spreadsheet or Google Docs which helps you maintain records of countless things such as your child’s school assessment time table, your major expenses for the month, and lists of various other necessary details.

You may upload your photos and important files to theGoogle Driveor to any using  computer to make school projectsother safe website for back-up and safe-keeping. You may download the applications of your choice.You can help your children with some innovative school projects as well.

7. Surprise: Did your husband invite his boss to dinner? Surprise him with a variety of gourmet dishes. Countless recipes are just a click away. Whether it is Thai soup or Indian kebab, Chinese fried rice or Mexican Chicken, salads, puddings or mocktails, you can choose to prepare any mouth-watering dish by the recipe from the internet.

8. Finally, Just Relax: Choose and watch an entertaining series from the Youtube, watch a film, listen to music from the internet radio and simply relax!

FAQS

Q I have started working from home as I need to take care of my young children. I mainly work on the office suit and accounting software. It’s easy enough. However, I really don’t know how to maintain my system. I am afraid of my system crashing out some day and getting my work disturbed. Give me suggestions on maintenance of my system.

Your operating system has come packed up with the Disk Tools; use them regularly to avoid errors and fragmentation on the disk and do back ups of your hard disk regularly.

Clean your system Registry with Registry Cleaner software from time to time. A damaged spilling coffeeor corrupt registry may result in the crashing of your system.

Clean cookies; delete history and other unwanted and junk files regularly. Use a Cleaner program for this purpose.

Install an anti-virus and anti spyware program on your hard disk for day to day check and cleaning.

On the external front, do not keep anything on or near your system. Do not spill your coffee, tea or snacks on your system. Keep your system dust free and clean. Keep away from very young children.

Q Is credit card necessary to shop online?

Credit cards are mostly accepted for online shopping but there is no need to be bogged down if you do not have one. You can purchase the same goods by using your debit card. Many e-commerce sites now have option of ‘Cash on Delivery,’ which is very convenient.

Smita’s Advice

Computers can give you wings and propel you into the air of freedom, financial security, getting connected with the people who matters, making friends with the new ones, learning new things, visiting to the new worlds and more!

Did you knowit was a woman, who is often referred to as the first computer programmer? No, I’m not going to tell how or when she did it. If you want to know about her then type ‘Countess Ada Lovelace’ and click search!

 

Smita Recommend

Watching 

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Reading

Computers for Housewife

Optimism is her fort

Book -Absolute Beginner’s Guide to Computer Basics

Book – Is This Thing On?, revised edition

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Stressed Up?

Simple Relaxing and De-stressing Techniques

You don’t need a reason for stress; any reason would do! For some women, it would be marriage,stressed up pregnancy, leaving their job or raising their children. For some others, it would be being single, not having a proper relationship or not getting connected to the right people.

For few others, it could be the delay in the arrival of their maid servant, the traffic signals, queue in the picture halls or the delay in their flight schedules; there is no specific reason required for stress and anxiety; any reason would do!

However, de-stressing and relaxation are tough nuts to crack! Any reason wouldn’t do. Feeling stress-free and feeling relaxed in the body and mind needs plan, action and implementation of the action to achieve them! Again, for some it’s easy and for the rest of the lot, it’s really tough!

Certain common tips to achieve peace of mind, feeling de-stressed and feeling relaxed:

 TIPS

1. Take a Deep Breathe: This is the universal technique of getting relaxed immediately; if you are going to attend an interview, going to meet your date or even going to attend the PTA meet at your children’s school; take few deep breathes, gulp lot of air and you will feel immediately calmed down.

Make it a routine. Embrace the breathing exercise or Pranayama. It would do a lot of good for you. Do it in the early morning hours. When it becomes a routine, you would feel automatically relaxed at times of stress.

2. Yoga and Meditation: All over the world, yoga and meditation has become a craze now. It gives you concrete yoga and meditationresults.

There are hundreds of meditation and yoga techniques. Meditation needs you to concentrate on a word or on the part in between your eyebrows. The word could be of God’s name or you may just repeat, “Relax” or any other positive word many times in your mind. You could even concentrate on your breathing. Relax your body, sit straight and take deep breathe before you start your meditation.

Yoga gives extremely positive results, when you do it in the right way you need a guru or a guide to train you and then you can you can practice on your own.

3. Morning WalkThe easiest of all the relaxation techniques is the early morning brisk walk in morning walkthe park; that’s when you become one with the awakening dawn, the weak murmur of the sleepy birds, the mostly empty benches, trees, plants and the flowers, few elders, few youngsters, few children and you amongst them all!

Breathe in the fresh air, fill your eyes with the greenery and take a brisk walk!

Walking on green grass, bare feet is also therapeutic.

4. Keep your body hydrated: Drink plenty of water. Dehydrated body makes it difficult to concentrate on things in hand and thereby creates stress to the mind.

5. Books and Reading: Books have a huge heart: they allow you to enter into the lives of their characters. books and readingThey take you away to the world beyond your world. You may visitSpain,Italy, India, Greenland andSouth Africaand more, simply by sitting on your comfortable coach. You just need to become a part of the characters.

I lost count of the countries I had visited with the characters of Robert Ludlum or Frederick Forsyth. That’s the power of reading and that’s the power of becoming one with their characters!

When you get loosened up completely, where is the space for your stress?

If you are a book lover, the reading would be your way of de-stressing after a hard day’s work or while travelling. If you are not a regular reader, you are missing out on something wonderful! In that case, you should start with some light reading and then take on from there.

6. Music and Listening: Listening music relaxes the core of your being; there is no better way of de-stressing and relaxing better than listening to music. It regulates your heart, stimulates your brain, reduces pain, promotes good sleep, well, that’s the power of music!

Whatever is your choice of music; hip hop to country to blue to metallic; just listen to your choice. That would do!

7. Body massage and steam bath:If you have the time and resources,Simple Relaxing and De-stressing Techniques you may indulge in the luxury of the de-stressing body massage and the relaxing steam bath. Soaking in the Spa would be another method of relaxing with water, flowers and fragrances.

 

8. Spend time with people you are comfortable with:Stay in positive company,whether they are friends, family, colleagues or neighbours, spending time with people you feel comfortable with, helps you to feel extremely relaxed. Do that often enough!

9.  Recreational activities:Do activites like playing games, singing, dancing, playing instrument, punching ball etc to ease yourself. Its good to enjoy lighter side of life. Recreational activities help maintain a balanced state of mind.
10. Others:There are so many other ways and means of relaxation techniques and de-stressing means, like autogenic training, laughing therapy swimming, aerobics etc.

FAQS

Q I am always short of time. I reach home quite late and my way of relaxation is sitting in front of the TV and trying to wind up. How can I otherwise feel relaxed?

The time is never short; we are short of options in using the time. You could get up early by an hour. You will have time for the morning walk, meditation or yoga.

On week-ends, you could spare a couple of hours for swimming, meeting friends, watching films, family outings etc.

While doing your household chores, you could listen to the music of your choice.

And you can take a couple of deep breathes often enough; you don’t need to allot specific time for that.

You need to fit yourself within the time frame for your own well being.

 

Q I am always surrounded by too many things in not-so-big space. Read inspirational quotesThis leaves me with lot of stress. How can I overcome this?

Sometimes, having too much stuff around leave you feeling overwhelmed and bog you down, eventually leading to stress. Living in messy surroundings brings in unwanted anxiety. That’s why you need to de-clutter to de-stress. Don’t start by clearing everything at once. That will only stress you further. Begin with small space and gradually moving to bigger things. A space that is uncluttered can feel satisfying and soothing.

 

  Smita’s Advice

All of us have work and family responsibilities, stressing out too much about them will Stress Bustersimply cause more grief – both physically and mentally. Relaxation and de-stressing helps you to keep away from the ill health and diseases.

Read inspirational quotes! There is a world of lessons in them for your smooth life and living!

“Doing something positive will help turn your mood around. When you smile, your body relaxes. When you experience human touch and interaction, it eases tension in your body.”

-      Simone Elkeles.

Smita Recommend

Watching 

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Reading

How To Reduce, Prevent, And Cope With Stress

10 Ways to Manage Stress

E- book - How Can I Manage Stress?

E- book - Steps to deal with stress

Book - How To Relax – Mind Body & Soul

Book - Total Relaxation + How to Manage Stress Easily

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Accessorizing

Nowadays, accessorizing has become an important element of dressing. You can make a plain dress lookwoman Accessories stylish and chic by adding a few pieces of accessories to it. Thankfully the market is flooded with numerous choices. All that you need is to find what will go best with your outfit.
Accessories can be classified into various categories. Anything that you wear apart from the dress material can be considered an accessory. If you like experimenting with your clothing and don’t want to spend too much money on buying new dresses, then splurge on accessories and get a different look each time.

Here are few tips to help you accessorize and to get the most out of your new and trendy look.

 

 TIPS

1. Jewellery: Jewellery is the first thing that comes to mind when you think of dressing up your outfit. Apart from traditional pieces, you can now purchase artificial jewellery that goes well with both ethnic and western dresses. The general rule of thumb is to wear chunky pieces with a plain dress and to wear simple, subtle pieces with heavily printed dress materials.

2. Bangles, earrings and anklets: Big bangles look beautiful with one piece dresses. Mix and matchBangles, earrings and anklets the colours to create a sense of variety. With earrings, you can really experiment. Long danglers look perfect with low cut necklines, similarly small studs will look beautiful and classy with collared shirts.

If you are fond of wearing quarter pants or knee length dresses, accessorise by wearing anklets. They add a touch of subtle feminism to any gear.

3. Shades: You will be surprised but even with a trendy pair of glares you can style up your appearance. Large framed shades are in vogue this season. You may see lot of celebs supporting big shades and looking modish. A nice pair of glares can go well with all your dresses and create a style statement.

4. Hats and Scarves: Not only do hats and scarves serve a utility purpose but they also make you look Hats and Scarves:fashionable. You can team up a hat with almost any outfit. With beachwear, you can adorn a straw hat.

If you live in cooler climes, wear woollen hats that come in beautiful designs and colours to go with your overcoat.  A simple chiffon scarf tied around the neck looks beautiful with both formal and casual wear.

5. Belts: Just a couple of years ago, no one could have imagined the difference a simple belt can make to an outfit. But now thanks to designers who brought to us a world full of choices. A wide belt can transform the look of your dress completely. It also makes the waist look smaller and doesn’t bring attention to your midriff. Use thinner belts when you wish to accentuate your waistline. Accessorizing with trendy belts will make you look voguish. You can mix and match them with various outfits.

6. While Traveling:  While traveling or holidaying, you are bound to travel light.  So you can do serious mixing-and-matching and with the help of accessories like scraves, belts, jewellery give new look to your clothes. You can get multiple looks with your little black dress with a bunch of simple accessories.

 

FAQS

Q. What is the best beach party look?

If you are wearing a two-piece, wear a long necklace that is in contrast to your outfit. Wear a sarong and support the look with classy shades and a low brim hat.

Q. I have simple black dress. Can you please suggest different looks at different time of the How to Accessorize a Black dressday with this dress?

You can get many looks with one simple dress, depending upon the occasion.

  1. Shopping: Wear a printed scarf or stole around your neck to add colour. You can even wear a shrug. Take a bright colour sling bag and comfortable nude colour footwear to complete the look.
  2. Night Out: Same black dress can be worn with heels and a dressy clutch. Wear a statement piece of jewellery like a neckpiece or a watch.
  3. Official Meeting: Wear a formal blazer and formal pumps in black or grey colour. Keep jewellery to small and elegant pieces, like studs or pearls. You can carry a mid-size handbag in neutral colour.
  4. Lunch with friends : Wear funky bangles and earrings to add drama to your attire. Gladiators or sandal with a colourful bag will look great.

Q. What accessories will help make a full figured woman look shapely? 

Wear dresses with small prints and tie a belt on your midriff to make your waist look smaller.

 

  Smita’s Advice

Accessorizing is fun and gives variety to clothing. You can create different looks with different accessories each time. Just team up any dress with jewellery, belts, scarves, the choices are endless. Next time you go out, don’t forget to accessorize to add a bit of spark and a dash of glamour to your evening.

Remember….A great outfit can be ruined with wrong accessories.

If clothes make the man, then perhaps, accessories define the outfit.

 

Smita Recommend

Watching 

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Reading

Tips on How to Accessorize Women’s Clothing

How to Accessorize a Black Dress

Book -Accessories of Dress

 

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Gossiping on a positive note

 

Gossiping on a positive note: A Breather of Fresh Air!

The word Gossip reminds me of Page 3 of the newspapers; the so-called personality and film related postive gosspinggossip (entertainment) programs of the TV Channels; the glossy murmurs of  the film magazines, tabloids etc. They are meant to be taken on a lighter vein; still it’s just not a feel good factor to a lot of people!

However, gossip can be used in a positive way as well. Just as the back of the same coin and it would do volume of good to you as well as to the others.

 TIPS

1. Always say nice things about people behind their backs:

 What is told in the ear of a man is often heard 100 miles away.

- Chinese Proverb

It’s not a rocket science, is it? Remember good things about people; however bad they are, every one must have a few good things about them in anyway; highlight only about their plus points, while talking about them to the others.

Even Hitler was said nice things about him by the others:

“… he (Hitler) has succeeded in restoring Germany to the most powerful position in Europe, and not only has he restored the position of his country, but he has even, to a very great extent, reversed the results of the Great War … whatever else may be thought about these exploits they are certainly among the most remarkable in the whole history of the world.”

- Winston Churchill

Am sure, you would be able to find a couple of nice things about people and spread the word about them around them. When it will reach the ears of the recipients, you create a good impression on them. They may speak well of you as well. If it will become a habit with you, you will have a group of well wishers wherever you go!

2. Steer conversation from negative to positive effects: When someone speaks ill of “someone else”, just say a few good things about that “someone else” to reverse the effects of the bad mouthing. The gossiper may hesitate to continue further on the ill-will road, and you may divert the conversation to another topic.

3. Spurt in the self confidence: Research shows that mainly people with low self esteem speaks ill of theGirls gossping others. When you consciously indulge in positive gossiping, both your self esteem and the self esteem of the recipient shall improve. Self Esteem is the basis of the all round personality development.

4. It stretches your imagination from a selfish “Me” to a wonderful “We”: When you start on the positive gossiping track, you stop thinking of yourself and start spreading the light about others all around the place. A light has the tendency of throwing off the darkness, fear and loneliness; it brings in feelings of warmth, happiness and positivity. Spread light and spread warmth and happiness all around you.

5. Emails:US Social Scientists had analyzed the thousands of emails belonging to the former Enron Energy Trading Company and had found that 1 out of every 7 Emails at work had indulged in gossip; negative gossip was more prevalent by 2.7 times than positive gossip.

These findings are more or less applicable to any organization in the corporate world.

As Emails are almost equivalent to direct interaction, albeit in written words, you can reverse the efforts of negative mails and infuse some positivity in your mails which will create a ripple effect along the shores on the recipient side of the mail.

6. Improve some one’s credibility: Positve gossiping improves on some one’s credibility through the worthy words spoken by you about them. Your praise may help them to get over their complex, (inferiority) if any; it will also help to bring in the positive energy into the home, work and other places and shall help in maintaining your status of well being.

7. Forgive: Not being able to forgive someone who has hurt us also gives birth to negative gossip. Forgiving some one helps you to stop talking about them in a wrong way.

 

FAQS

Q There is a group of people at my work, who always indulge in negative gossiping as though “aimed to Girls Whisperingdegrade all and sundry”. As they are from my eastern wing, I am unable to avoid them as well. Most of the time, I can’t stomach listening to such nonsense about the others. I just wouldn’t know what to do?

Of course you know: as you are a fairly decent person, you wouldn’t want to hurt the people whose gossip is “aimed to degrade all and sundry”.

Somehow, you should try to avoid such people like plague and virus. Start slowly!

On the onset of their, “Classic syndrome”, you start pretending as though you are busy with work, busy on the phone, busy having engrossed into your files, busy getting a cup of coffee, busy scratching on the notepad, busy locating another colleague or busy trying to clarify a point with your boss etc.

Team up with a few positive people and hang out with them. Am sure, there must at least be a couple of people like you, good and constructive at your work.

Take your lunch from outside for some time or with the people whom you like at least vaguely!

They may get your point; of course, you may become a part of their gossip next! Don’t give them any important. Just move on with your career.

If it gets worse, ask for a transfer to another wing or department in your organization.

Q How is gossiping different from backbiting?How can gossiping be positive?

Gossiping is idle talk or sensational talk whereas backbiting is unsporting attack behind a person’s back.

Gossiping can be termed as a harmless way of venting frustration and sharing insecurities. Backbiting is speaking against someone with evil heart.

Q How can gossiping be positive?

As long as Gossiping is not malicious or irresponsible rumour-mongering, it is not exactly a bad thing. Infact, many firms are supporting ‘water cooler conversations’. Few minutes of gossiping near water cooler can help you beat stress. And this gossip can even be talking about your kids or boyfriend.

 

  Smita’s Advice

Talking about others in a wrong way can never be right! When that boomerang comes back to haunt you, it would hurt, wouldn’t it?

However, Positive Gossiping is constructive, effective, uplifting and helps you in your well-being, apart from helping others to feel good about them.

Go ahead, indulge in Gossip; let it just be all positive!

 

Smita Recommend


Reading

Positive gossip

The benefits of positive gossip

E-Book -  The Visual Impact of Gossip

Book – Good Gossip

Book -The Power of Positive Gossip


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Health and Nutrition for Women

A woman never fails to amaze me. She is the affectionate daughter, a dutiful wife, a devoted mother, a loyal friend,fruits and milk an outstanding companion, a superb teacher and a coach, an efficient employee and is indeed an excellent employer too.

She shop around for her family needs, she visit doctors for her family health, she insist on her family taking nutrient meals, milk and fruits and wait for her family to come home at late nights!

Sadly, she doesn’t take care of herself! She doesn’t give importance to herself. She treats herself as though one amongst the multiple material things that are strewn around her house, lifeless and useful only for the others.

No wonder sooner or later, she starts looking matured compared to her age! She becomes obese for want of exercise, she gets into various discomforts of body due to lack of nutritious supplements and she feels irritated and upset; she shows her frustration on her family giving raise to misunderstanding and unrest in the family from time to time.

There are certain general tips to take care of you starting from now!

TIPS

1.   Be SelfishBe selfish; be selfish just for a couple of hours daily, without feeling guilty. Allot a time for woman eating watermelonyourself and make it clear to your family that they should not interfere in your special time with yourself.

Listen to music, go for a walk, have a Starbucks flavoured coffee along with the red velvet whoopee pie; talk to yourself, talk to your friends over phone, lie down for a cat nap, watch a part of your favourite movie; do anything in your own special time. You are not supposed to bring water to your children, pass on the spectacles to your husband; open the gates for the visitors, and well, you got the point!

 2.   Take care of your diet: Supplement your food with calcium and nutrition; consult your family doctor. Eat well to take care of yourself well, so that you shall be able to take care of your family well. Most importantly, do not eat to compensate for your emotional upheavals. Eat at the right time and eat healthy wholesome food.

3.   Maintain a Diet Chart: Keep diet chart according to your health requirements: it could be the Protein Rich Diet Plan, Low Carb Diet Plan, Weight Loss Diet Plan, Diabetic Diet Chart and more. You may even link your exercise chart with that of the diet chart for comparative results.

4.   Diet plan and Balance between Calories: The very success of any weight-loss diet plan depends on the difference between your daily calorie intake and the output of it. Means, you should burn more calories than what you consume! Make a chart of calories required to perform your day to day activities and make a note of the calories gained from your food intake and try to strike a balance between these two!

5.   Keep a Control on Whites and other fat foods: Certain food items are imperative to bringconsuming junk food in the taste and flavour to the food. However, along with the taste and flavour they also bring in different diseases to your body.

Research says that sugar and salt are addictive in nature. Research also says that unless you control the intake of sugar and salt, it would be difficult to keep a check on your diet plan. Research further says that high intake of sugar and salt, fast, fried and junk food give rise to blood pressure related issues, heart and kidney related problems and much more. Hence, control the white foods and other fast foods in your diet.

6.   Balanced FoodA well-balanced food results in a well balanced and healthy body. A healthy food also makes your skin to glow and your hair to shine.Balanced Food

7.   Stages of Life and the Stress for the Nutrition: Women have significantly different stages of life that needs different nutritional requirements; from childhood, puberty to fertility, pregnancy, nursing and menopause; women need to fulfil different nutritional requirements according to their age and body composition. You should plan your diet taking into account your age, health condition and body composition and should follow the plan strictly without fail.

FAQS

Q. I need guidance on the swap food techniques. Can you help me on this?

Swap food technique is more of a commonsense than of a rocket science!

  •  Swap full cream milk with skimmed or toned milk.swap food techniques
  • Embrace wholegrain cereals and multi-grain wheat options.
  • Use fat-free yogurt. Use more of boiled or steamed food and less of fried food.
  • Substitute ordinary cooking oil with Olive Oil for cooking.
  • Eat unsalted nuts rather than the salted ones.
  • Avoid or keep to the minimum of the consumption in cheese,  butter and other milk fats.
  • Replace white bread with brown or multi-grain bread.
  • Finally, eat plenty of fruits and vegetables.
  • Bring in healthy alternative to not-so healthy food.

 

Q There is always left-over food in the refrigerator, which I tend to eat next day. I don’t feel like throwing away the food. What can I do?

Your stomach is not a dustbin where you keep putting in all the left over food. Sometimes it’s ok, but not always. Make ‘’just’’ sufficient food for the family. If food is left then serve to everyone on table.

Sometimes use your imagination and modify the left over food with an added ingredients, flavour and taste; serve to the family and consume.

 

 Smita’s Advice

 

A woman is morally bound to take care of herself as much as she takes care of the others in the family.

By adding the nutritional components into your food and by maintaining the healthy and balanced eating habits, you will find a lot of improvement on the quality of your life-style. It will also keep you and your family disease-free or at least keep the disease of a family member well in control.

What you eat, so you become!

 

Smita Recommends

Watching

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Essential Nutrition for Women’s Health

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E-Book – Nutrition And Women’s Health

Book - Super Nutrition for Women

 

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Driving

The Art and Science of Driving for Women

Driving gives you a feeling of freedom, which  boost your self-confidence; confidence to secure her place in the women driving a carworld where men lead in all the fields, whether it is in the field of business science, medical science, work science or rocket science!

Driving needs certain prerequisites like alertness of mind, smooth co-ordination of the body, mind and the machine and a mindset of a defensive player! It also needs the sharpness of a decision to be taken on a fraction of a second to avoid collisions with the other vehicles and people on the road! It needs the logical reasoning and the street smartness in handling the road rage and the after-effects of an unavoidable accident on the road, if that happens!

A woman of course, can drive better than a man because she has the alertness of mind, sharpness of thoughts, logical reasoning and street smartness in handling the vehicle, like she is used to handling the rest of her life responsibilities.

Driving can be extremely relaxing, can be soothing on the nerves after a long day at work; it can be an enjoyable experience of having listening to your own audio delicacies at the cosy comfort of your car.

However, in order to enjoy an uninterrupted and smooth driving, you need to take care of your vehicle, adjust your car according to the weather conditions, attire according to the driving distance, not to get entangled into any problems on the road and to feel safe within the confines of your vehicle.

Certain Common Tips on various things you need to take into account on driving:

 TIPS

1. Take care of Your Vehicle: Before you hit on the road, hit on the tires; check on them for proper air pressure and tread depth; make your tires well balanced and vehicle well aligned. Make it an once in a month affair for your own safety against skidding; it will also help in the increase of the tyre mileage and precise steering, apart from the improvement in the performance and comfort of the car.

You should also check the condition of your headlights, rear lights, brake lights and turn indicators to see whether they are in a proper working condition. The main elements of steering, clutch, brake and accelerator should also be kept in a well balanced condition all the time.

You should give your car for servicing according to the requirement for the fine tuning of your car and to avoid unwanted hassles while driving.

2. Mind your Mind: Be alert and do defensive driving throughout the time of your driving.

If you are emotionally upset, feel ill, feel very tired; if you are on any medication that mayDrive within speed limits make you drowsy, do not drive – period!

Keep a watch on your speed. The speed of your vehicle should depend upon the weather, the road condition, the traffic flow and the speed limit prescribed by the particular locality. Drive within speed limits and drive with a sense of responsibility to avoid accidents.

Always drive defensively: react to the driving and the sign language of the other drivers.

Allow people to overtake, if they are driving too close behind you with blaring horns and songs. Don’t get into an offensive mood.

Do not get into the highway hypnosis or drowsiness during long drives. Always drive with a companion during long drives, so that you could stop from time to time for refreshments, to stretch your legs and to sleep off the sleepiness.

Always wear seat belt for your safety.

3Things to Avoid while driving: Avoid wearing high heels while driving; experts had even Things to Avoid while drivingcalled for a ban on high heels, stilettos and platform shoes while driving for women. It may lead to your loosing the control of your car.

Do not use mobile phones while driving; it may distract you completely.

Do not do texting while driving

Do not touch up your make up while driving

Avoid multi-tasking like eating, drinking, talking on the phone and having a conversation while driving! It could distract you greatly!

4. The weather Conditions:Whether it is in winter or in the rainy season, drive with extra caution. Set your head lights to dim or better use fog lights during the winter season.

During rain, increase your distance from the other drivers. Take extra care while applying brakes and while driving in curves and turns. While the wiper is on, your headlights should also be on. Drive slow.

5. Night Driving: Your headlights and the tail lights should be kept ON during the entire period of your driving till you can see the road clearly on sunrise or later.

Avoid stopping around a curve to avoid accidents by the tailgates.

Keep the headlights on low beam when another vehicle is about 200 meters from you or when you drive behind another vehicle at that distance.
Stay on the road by following the road signs, reflective signals and the vehicles driving before you.

6. Safety Tips for women drivers who drive alone: In order to safeguard yourself from the unwanted Safety Tips for women drivers who drive aloneelements, you should keep your car doors locked and windows raised.

Allow a fast driver to overtake you; don’t get entangled into the road rage atmosphere.

Be alert all the time; keep your music down, your ears up and your eyes constantly around for any signs of trouble.

Be alert in the parking lot. Park your car in a well-lit area, away from the dark corners.

Avoid talking to the strangers at night whether it is at the parking lot or at the signals.

FAQS 

Q. I know that using of the mobile is not allowed while driving. I generally keep my mobile in the silent mode and try to avoid answering the calls while driving. However, I am a Doctor and sometimes, I may get professional phone calls regarding treatment from my work. Guess I can answer such calls while driving.

Most of the countries in the world has made it mandatory that mobile conversation and vehicle driving should not get mixed up; the laws not only prevents you from using the mobile, but also has provision for imposing fines or impounding the mobile set as punishment.

The conversation over mobile distracts a person to a great extent, endangering both the driver and the people on the road. Avoid using phones while driving. Most of the countries rather would require you to keep the mobiles switched off and not on the silent mode.

Smita’s Advice

For a woman, driving a vehicle is not just a means of mobility from one place to another; it is a proud statement of her freedom and self-reliance to the world; it is a statement from her that she can take on the roads; take on the people and take on the world most comfortably and can become a roaring success at that!

“A driver is a king on a vinyl bucket-seat throne, changing direction with the turn of a wheel, changing the climate with a flick of the button, changing the music with the switch of a dial.”

-          Andrew H. Malcolm

As long as you drive with alert state of mind and defensively, you may keep changing the directions, the climate and the music in your car!

 

Smita Recommend

Watching

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Reading

Women Driving Alone

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E-Book – Green Driving Tips

E-Book – Every Day Driving Tips

Book – Don’t Text and Drive

Book – In the Driver’s Seat: A Girl’s Guide to Her First Car

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